Look Inside

Hello my lovelies!
It has recently come to my attention that I'm kind of a hypocrite. I don't quite practice what I preach. That is to say that I am the first person to remind people to love themselves and the last to actually love myself (most of the time). All that being said, I've been trying to look inside myself the way I look inside my friends and family.
A solid example might be the friends I've made here in college. I don't love Juneau, Kenai, Barrow, Spokane, Anchorage, Minnesota, A, and C because they look a certain way. In fact, I love them completely separate from their appearances. When I think about my favorite parts of K&A or Kansas & Colorado, their looks are not what pop into my mind.  So, why is it so hard for me to apply the same thing to myself?
I love the way I express myself through makeup and fashion (side note; would any of you be interested in seeing some more of that kind of stuff?). But looking inside to love myself is hard because maybe I'm not sure yet. That's an odd statement, I'm very aware. But, I'm not sure yet if I'm at the point where I'm anything to be proud of.
Now that the heavy stuff is out of the way, let's get heavier!
I can't imagine how much more difficult that journey would be if my outsides and insides didn't match. I have a hard enough time being in a body that matches the person inside my head. Trans and agendered people need the same support (probably more) than I do on my journey. It seems so strange to me that people are more comfortable with the idea of changing their appearance for cosmetic or frivolous reasons than people metamorphosing into who they were meant to be all along.
Life is hard enough for all of us anyway, and if we choose to step back and look inside ourselves first, maybe we can remember how to support each other in all the ways we wish to be supported.
Maybe I just wasted your time with this rant, but I felt that it all really needed to be said. Or, at least onto the page and out of my brain.
Lots of love,
EG